How to plan a trip that feeds the soul

I booked a trip to Sweden this weekend.

Here we are talking about “soul” and I’m sure for most Black Women, Sweden does not come to mind. I mean to be honest it doesn’t come to mind for me either. Then why did I choose Sweden?

I truly needed to be convinced to even go anywhere at all. The stresses of life are weighing on me and I know it. All of my journal entries for the past 3 months I state, “My soul is dying,” and I mean it. But, life keeps on moving no matter what state of being a soul is in and I needed to keep moving too.

There are deadlines at work, the paranoia of being black in corporate is seeping in, my family needs me more than ever during the government shutdown since they are all federal workers, I need to maintain my relationship with my partner. My list of responsibilities seem to be growing, as my will to do anything was shrinking.

So, when my mom said again, probably for the 3rd or 4th time that I should go somewhere. I listened. Well, not before saying I couldn’t go anywhere there’s too much to do and not enough time (literally not enough with how slowly I accrue PTO). But, afterwards, I listened. I need this.

Step 1: Determine the logistics and wants

Skyscanner is my go to site for cheap flights. After checking my work calendar, my personal calendar, and my shared calendar with my partner, I picked some dates I thought could work and hit the “explore everywhere” button.

The only things I wanted for this trip to help determine the place were:

1. Not within the United States

   With all that is going on in this country, I need a break from the onslaught of news.

2. Under $500 for flight

   A last minute trip, that I have no money saved for. We are balling on a budget. I will be staying in a hostel and preferably one that has a kitchen. IYKYK.

3. Foreign Buildings

   Meaning I didn’t want anything that was too city. That was too familiar. I want to be able to look around and feel like I was in a foreign place, unmistakably.

4. Can feel “done” in a weekend

   Some cities you look around and feel overwhelmed by all that you can do and start feeling like you don’t have enough time. I did not want that feeling especially since this is a trip where I have very little time.

   
   

Step 2: Pick a destination

With the framework of the things I want known, the destination revealed itself.

Sweden, referred to as “worlds smallest big city.” It will take a 15 hour travel day from Portland but, I would get a good 2.5 days to spend there. They have pretty buildings, cobblestone streets and it will be peak Christmas Market season. Every blog I looked up said you would need max 3 days including time to simply wander around. I also had never been there before which made it all the more interesting.

It seemed like a good enough fit, because truthfully the destination doesn’t really matter. Of course for a soul reviving trip you want to go somewhere it will at least feel comfortable. But what is needed most to feed the soul is meaning, purpose, and intent, which can be applied to anyplace you choose.

The destination is just a jumpstart. Traveling unleashes your openness, as you experience new things you are forced to be more in the moment. We are taking advantage of the openness to delve deeper into the meaning, purpose and intent of the trip.

Step 3: Determine your meaning, purpose, and intent

This is the prework/ groundwork where I have to be honest of what my soul even needs.

Sure, I picked Sweden because it seemed interesting enough and fit within my logistics and wants. But, after booking the trip I remembered sometime in the past year watching a video about how Swedes aren’t very open. They keep to themselves, opting out of socializing with strangers.

Part of me wonders if I subconsciously picked Sweden for my first solo trip in 3 years because I need to be alone. No social pressures of engaging with others that some places like Colombia or Brazil can have. A place where I might just be able to let my mask down and be.

Purpose: Just Be.

Of course the intent of this trip has been stated many times “to feed the soul,” but what does that look like? For me it’s working on my magazine, Arrival. Taking photos, writing, talking to like minded black women about their travels abroad or adventures in the great outdoors. It makes my heart soar just thinking about it. Arrival began not just in wanting to share others stories but to share my own. I’ve been feeling like my own stories were dwindling and that I haven’t made any new ones in a while. This is the crux of why my soul is dying. My life’s time is being taken by corporate in exchange for money. Leaving me very little of my life’s time to live. Even though its for a brief time I just need to live my life the way I see fit.

Intent: Live Life the way I see fit.

The reason why my mom had to tell me more than once to book a trip is honestly not because I am “too busy.” It’s because getting that taste of the freedom of living my life the way I see fit, is not enough. I don’t want a lick of ice cream I want the whole cone. The constraints of PTO are tight. It takes me damn near one month to accrue one day of PTO. These days are precious. These are the only days I get to live. But they also feel like a coping mechanism. A little something to take the edge off of my life.

The things is, I find it hard to believe in coping when there are ways to actually solve the problems instead of coping with them. Why endure a difficult situation when you don’t have to? What I have to grapple with is that right now, I have to endure. Trading my time for money is my only way of life right now to sustain my ever growing list of responsibilities. So, until I build a new world for myself, I have to cope.

In the meantime though, during this trip I get to sharpen view of the world I hope to build. I get to give my life more meaning than work. I get to brighten my light and feed my soul. The meaning of this trip is freedom.

Meaning: Freedom

Step 4: Align plans with action

What will I actually do on this trip? I mean, because I’m not just going to Sweden to do nothing. I can do that here. But, what actions can I do to take advantage of the openness that travel brings me?

In Sweden this can look like:

• Sitting on a park bench, taking things in, existing.

• Going to a cafe to write or read

• Attending a museum to inspire me creatively

• Reaching out to a black woman to talk about living in Sweden

• Going on a photo walk through the city to memorialize my experience

• Dancing at a club where no one knows me

• Wearing clothes that make me feel amazing and will look great on the Stockholm streets

• Indulging in food so good it makes me do my food shimmy

• Catching the sunrise and sunset of each day

• Going to a Christmas Market drinking mulled wine and eating roasted chestnuts

• Taking the subway and the boats to the different islands that make up Stockholm seeing the city from different angles.

This might not be the packed vacation schedule filled to the brim with excursions and touristy things you might be used to. But I can guarantee you if you follow the steps and make your own list you will be left with what your soul truly needs.

Subscribe to see the updates from when I go on my trip, I’ll have to let you know how my soul feels afterwards. <3